Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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