am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
why do cheetos always look like penises
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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