We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize