he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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