I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
50% drunk capacity currently
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
