what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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