I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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