hotel room ftw
too bad you live with your parents still
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize