ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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