I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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