is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
