I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
