What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog