i may or may not be watching the land before time
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You ruined the universe
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
