Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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