new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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