Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize