Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
