Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize