So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize