i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
