i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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