God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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