I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
