My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
True college students do jello shots in the library
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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