you didnt know i had herpes?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
