Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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