The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
