I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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