she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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