Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
We left the knife in your bed.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize