More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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