I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I love you. Go after that dick
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
