Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
well you can't waste a boner
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
