D3 body, D1 cock
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
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