The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Randomize
