She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
