She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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