My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
