hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
