she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
