come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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