Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
