i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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