It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
