so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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