how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
