He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
