well I can't set my house on fire every night
Its about making memories worth repressing
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
organizing the empties. That sober.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
