You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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